I wanna make this year ending special by thanking two of the most important friends in my life.
We are classmates way back in college. We seldom greet each other due to our sets of friends na din. One of them became my seatmate...
Best Girl Bud 1 - The Seatmate
I don't usually talk to her. I find her masungit dahil hindi nya ako pinapansin. Hahahaha! Cheesy! Anyway, I remembered I sent her a prank message. She replied: "To whom did you get my number?" I was literally "oops! ang taray!" I was intimidated. :)
And then I joined FEU Pep Squad late 2004. I saw her. She's a member of FEU Pep Squad from the beginning of the class year 2002. She's one of the leaders back then. Literal na iwasan talaga. Walang pansinan and stuffs. And then I said, i didn't join because of you.. Hahaha! I easily get intimidated without even knowing the person. (say, that's one of my problems)
Months passed, I became an FEU Green Bisons Drummer. She's still my classmate for the 2nd semester. She became the girlfriend of our classmate and my co-drummer as well.
Summer of 2005, we are required for an OJT. I was hired at Filinvest, I informed the guy of this opportunity. He came, with his girlfriend. And then I said, oh no.. :( Hahaha! Things went well for us. She became my friend. We laughed and spent time talking about her boyfriend, (whom is also a good friend of mine) we stayed up late in Shangri-La Ortigas for an FLI Corporate exhibit, and complaining.. Hahaha! Guy's not sending her text message since morning. Wala naman sya magawa sa haus kaya pumasok kami pareho ng FLI ng Saturday. Noon din namang gabing yun, The guy called me. Sinabi nyang pupunta sya ng Shang pero wag ako maingay. Wag ko daw sasabihin na inayos nya yung pinto ni girl at nilagyan nya ng electric fan yung room. Hahaha! Ok sige, sabi ko. Sobrang excited ako that night. Kasi masosorpresa si girl. Ayun, tumawag sa akin si guy, at sabi nya sa akin labas daw kami and he's waiting outside. Ang mukha ni girl.. :) Hehe. I borrowed his car. And they both jumped in. I drove like a maniac around Shangri-La and girl's a little hysterical.. :) It was a fun night. Since then, we are good friends na. That's where we started.
And the other became our group leader..,
Best Girl Bud 2 - The Baby Thesis Leader
Hindi naman talaga kami close. Naging leader kasi namin sya noong 4th year sa thesis namin. She's currently in a relationship with a chinese guy back then. Just the normal stuff, we are friends.. Never experienced intimidation around her. She's accomodating and all. Kaya ok lang. Late 2005, they broke up. The guy left her with a child in her tummy. Sobrang depressed ni girl. Hindi makakonsentreyt sa trabaho nya as our group leader. Sobrang depresyon. Hindi ko maexplain ang pakiramdam pag nakikita ko syang tuliro. Funny din, nagbiro kami ng isang kagrupo ko. Ang title kasi ng thesis namin: Effects of FEU Scandal to the FEU Community. Nilagay namin, "If given a chance, are you willing to do what you see?" Parang ganon ang style. Ang lola mo, nilagay! Hala! Nakwestyon kami ng panel! Hahaha! I feel bad about it afterwards.. Ganon sya kabroken-hearted.
We graduated 2006. She graduated medyo malaki na ang tiyan. Nagkatrabaho and stuffs. Nagforward ako ng message sa yahoo mail I think about the death of two former American Presidents dated April 24, 2007. Yan na yung nagopen ng communication namin ulit. She gave me her globe number. Doon na din kami unang nagkaYM at nagpagawa sya ng design ng imbitasyon nya para sa unang kaarawan ng anak nyang si Andrei. Ako 'tong si first time gumawa ng layout, sige! Ayos naman ang lumabas. Pero hindi ako nakapunta sa anak nya. Syempre nalaman ko, bago ang jowabels ng lola mo.. Hala, pinagalitan ko ng bongga! Ayun, awa ng Diyos, hindi nakinig.
Hanggang sa dumating na naman ang point na nagkaproblema si babae dahil sa lalaki. Umabot pa sa puntong nagkautang pa dahil sa lechugas na pagpunta ng Dubai ni guy the second.
We talk and argue about these things. Which really made me so pissed because I think her lack of interest in listening. Awww.. We continue struggling and talking until one time, she decided to call it off. I can't remember how..
2008, I had a major heart problem. I had to figure out where to start. I had nowhere to go. I had no one to talk to. But I made friends along the way. Very good friends. And the baby thesis leader is also my best bud during that time. I listened to her. Because I believe she all went through all this heartbreaking stuffs. Bigger problems than mine. That's what I had in mind. I fought with her. I fought for what I believe was right. She was right.. I can do it.. I did it!
2009 was the most funny year for both of us. We laugh at our crazy moments in front of the webcam, sharing farms and designs, laugh and play with my seatmate, and most of all, she just listen to what I am saying. Sa kanya ko din ipinapakita ang mga ginagawa ko. Kasi alam kong appreciative sya sa mga ganoong klaseng bagay
I found a family in them..
I pray our friendship will last forever. Aivy Li and Riyah Dizon, thank you!
Thursday, December 31, 2009
Sunday, December 20, 2009
MY BUCKET LIST
Earlier, my Ate and I went browsing my notes from my old Business Mirror notebook. She saw my sketches of the Patapon Army and their chants. It's funny remembering how I went gaga over the PSP Patapon's first game installment. How I repeatedly tapping my right foot anywhere while counting 1-2-3-4 or Pata-pata-pata-pon / Pon-pon-pata-pon is crazier as I ever imagined. Cuz you see, I don't speak to anyone while playing because I will lose my concentration. Playing this game's never been so much fun! Literally concentrating up to your fullest!
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
MANILA LENTE CLUB: ON THEIR WAY TO ANAWANGIN. WILL I EVER MAKE IT?
I recently joined this Manila based Photography club called the Manila Lente or Manilente. I've always wanted to join a club since I noticed that I am not taking photography seriously. I went out to shoot just for fun and never made it to its higher level. I'm insane! I spent like what? Thousand bucks to use it just like a normal digital camera? Anyway, I get to use my cam on several events with pay. And I am quite happy about it. The thoughts of using my camera as a living is possible. :)
Getting back, I recently joined the club to shoot out of town. I've always wanted to do this with friends. But I can't find one who'll be devotionally supportive of this idea. We'll be off to Anawangin, Zambales on January. I was shocked to see the items that the club would bring to this event.
FOR PERSONAL USE:
GROUP ITEMS
OPTIONAL ITEMS:
After I read these, I said "Oh my God!!!!! Nooo way!" And I think you all have the idea that we're gonna camp and trek. And ride a boat! I'm not really maarte when I get dirt or what but my main problem is my respiratory system. I have a problem carrying things bigger than a watermelon. I have a problem walking under the sun because when I sweat and when I feel heat, I have the tendency to breakdown. If we're below 10 I think we'll commute and that's a hassle for me because of the problems I have mentioned above. I actually experienced to climb a mountain but that was when I am still in high school and I am still thin! Oh good Lord.
I don't want to spoil the fun. I'm up for the challenge. I never went out of town with a bunch of new people before. I am also up for adventure and new friends. I know one guy from them. He's Andropov Abad. He's friend of Aivy.
I never saw the beauty of nature through a lens before. Or even if I did, I never really get to appreciate it. I believe in higher power now. I went through a lot now, I see things way far too imaginable. I experienced a lot of things in the past that I want to see the sky and the sun blend into heavens. I wanna experience good things life has to offer me. I wanna wake up in the morning feeling happy that I am alive.
Now, who would like to come and experience God's grace with me?
Getting back, I recently joined the club to shoot out of town. I've always wanted to do this with friends. But I can't find one who'll be devotionally supportive of this idea. We'll be off to Anawangin, Zambales on January. I was shocked to see the items that the club would bring to this event.
FOR PERSONAL USE:
- Bible / Notebook & Pen / Devotional Guides
- Backpack (Day Pack) Light Pack
- Food & Snacks
- Emergency Rations
- Drinking Water / Water Container (1.5L)
- Clothing & Underwear = Number of days + 1 (Standard)
- Survival Kit / Repair Kit / Multi-purpose Knife
- Flashlight / Head lamp / Extra Batteries
- Swim / Snorkeling gear
- Proper footwear / Sandals
- Sun sleeve / Arm warmer
- Hat / Cap
- Poncho / Rain Gear
- Blanket / Jacket / Sweat Shirt
- Sleeping Bag / Mat
- First Aid / Medicine Kit
- Dry / Waterproof Bag
- Mess Kit / Utensils
- Plastic / Trash Bags
- Watter Bottle / 1.5L
- Insect Repellant
- Sun Block
- Toothpaste & Toothbrush
- Alcohol
- Toiletries
- Dog Tag / Name Tag / Group or Personal ID
GROUP ITEMS
- Tent
- Ground Sheet
- Cook Stove & Fuel Refill (Butane Gas)
- Cookware / Cooking Tools
- Bolo / Shovel
OPTIONAL ITEMS:
- Camera / Tripod
- Hammock
- Kerosene / Electric Lantern / Tent Light
- Camp Chair
After I read these, I said "Oh my God!!!!! Nooo way!" And I think you all have the idea that we're gonna camp and trek. And ride a boat! I'm not really maarte when I get dirt or what but my main problem is my respiratory system. I have a problem carrying things bigger than a watermelon. I have a problem walking under the sun because when I sweat and when I feel heat, I have the tendency to breakdown. If we're below 10 I think we'll commute and that's a hassle for me because of the problems I have mentioned above. I actually experienced to climb a mountain but that was when I am still in high school and I am still thin! Oh good Lord.
I don't want to spoil the fun. I'm up for the challenge. I never went out of town with a bunch of new people before. I am also up for adventure and new friends. I know one guy from them. He's Andropov Abad. He's friend of Aivy.
I never saw the beauty of nature through a lens before. Or even if I did, I never really get to appreciate it. I believe in higher power now. I went through a lot now, I see things way far too imaginable. I experienced a lot of things in the past that I want to see the sky and the sun blend into heavens. I wanna experience good things life has to offer me. I wanna wake up in the morning feeling happy that I am alive.
Now, who would like to come and experience God's grace with me?
Friday, December 11, 2009
PARANORMAL ACTIVITY AND OTHER STUFFS
I was into the movie house few hours back. I watched Paranormal Activity alone! Yes, alone! I guess I am super brave watching this kind since I don't believe in exorcisms and all. Since I am a Mass Communication grad, i get to admire the special effects used and don't fall into the thoughts of what I'm seeing is true.
Paranormal Activity is an indie film shown way back 2007. :)
We got home late but we're still able to watch PBB Double up. I uploaded pictures from our recent Citystate event at Batulao, Batangas. Boy, I had so much fun with the group this time [ December 6 ] than last November event with the same group. I miss them so much. Hahaha!
From left to right:
Cathy, Me, Krizh and Sonny
Thursday, December 10, 2009
NOW WHAT?
I don't have a slightest idea why the hell my previous post is not visible even to my naked eye. What the hell happened? I don't know who's to blame. I just want to point fingers and make a hole in the wall! Hehehehe.
Allrighty, I made an invites for Kenneth. They'll use it for their Christmas Party on the 22nd. I am invited. Wondering if I will come or not. But I am a little excited anyway. :) Tee hee.
The invitation card I made for SOHO Central..
Allrighty, I made an invites for Kenneth. They'll use it for their Christmas Party on the 22nd. I am invited. Wondering if I will come or not. But I am a little excited anyway. :) Tee hee.
The invitation card I made for SOHO Central..
Wednesday, December 9, 2009
WHAT THE FUCK AM I STILL DOING UP LATE AT THIS HOUR?
Lifted from my friendster blog dated December 2
Allright again, I thought the battle with my sleeping habit’s finally over. I am definitely wrong again. It’s 3:15 in the morning. I had just finished doing Riyah’s pakiusap and the thought of blogging made clear to me.
Allright, so what are we going to talk about today? It’s been how many months since I last dropped a line here? And boy was I upset that day. I can still remember the reason why. Very clear to me.
Just a few months back, I learned something really upseting and I sensed victory all at the same time. First, because I thought it ended. I thought the person decided to end the unusual relationship she had, few years ago. The reason why I AM victorious because I know, deep in my heart that she’ll never become happy because of these reasons:
1. she ended up being the number two. What’s disgusting about this is that her live in partner has a long time boyfriend. (Yes, they are living together)
2. She will never know what she really want unless she gave herself a chance to know things beyond the usual.
3. What I thought about her, are true. And that’s the reason why I decided to cut the bridge connecting our worlds.
You see, it is not always bitterness and other painful stuff that keeps people from moving on. It is that simple thought of how better and how happy life there is with that special someone. And now it’s over. Her best days will be some of the guy’s worst. In my case, it is not. I proved myself wrong for the nth time. Even if I am seeing someone today, I still ask myself, is it all worth it? Yes, it is. I keep on reminding myself to find a reason to stay happy each day. A friend once told me: you have to go through the phases so if it happens to you again, you know how to bounce back. Very true. I still thank her for this. I cannot forget how her patience brought me back to life. For this, i always smell victory. I always feel blessed and accompanied. I became closer to my family. I see a lot of my friends. I get in touch with my old old friends. A lot of things happened. And for these, I am grateful.
Happiness is not about being into a relationship you know won’t last. It’s not about getting laid and scream each other’s name while in heaven (hahahaha) It’s about finding your soul, getting up from battle, waking up without worries, giving yourself a chance to know what matters most and finally, being with someone destined to be yours. No questions asked, no hesitations, no other things.
Allright again, I thought the battle with my sleeping habit’s finally over. I am definitely wrong again. It’s 3:15 in the morning. I had just finished doing Riyah’s pakiusap and the thought of blogging made clear to me.
Allright, so what are we going to talk about today? It’s been how many months since I last dropped a line here? And boy was I upset that day. I can still remember the reason why. Very clear to me.
Just a few months back, I learned something really upseting and I sensed victory all at the same time. First, because I thought it ended. I thought the person decided to end the unusual relationship she had, few years ago. The reason why I AM victorious because I know, deep in my heart that she’ll never become happy because of these reasons:
1. she ended up being the number two. What’s disgusting about this is that her live in partner has a long time boyfriend. (Yes, they are living together)
2. She will never know what she really want unless she gave herself a chance to know things beyond the usual.
3. What I thought about her, are true. And that’s the reason why I decided to cut the bridge connecting our worlds.
You see, it is not always bitterness and other painful stuff that keeps people from moving on. It is that simple thought of how better and how happy life there is with that special someone. And now it’s over. Her best days will be some of the guy’s worst. In my case, it is not. I proved myself wrong for the nth time. Even if I am seeing someone today, I still ask myself, is it all worth it? Yes, it is. I keep on reminding myself to find a reason to stay happy each day. A friend once told me: you have to go through the phases so if it happens to you again, you know how to bounce back. Very true. I still thank her for this. I cannot forget how her patience brought me back to life. For this, i always smell victory. I always feel blessed and accompanied. I became closer to my family. I see a lot of my friends. I get in touch with my old old friends. A lot of things happened. And for these, I am grateful.
Happiness is not about being into a relationship you know won’t last. It’s not about getting laid and scream each other’s name while in heaven (hahahaha) It’s about finding your soul, getting up from battle, waking up without worries, giving yourself a chance to know what matters most and finally, being with someone destined to be yours. No questions asked, no hesitations, no other things.
A RUBBER BAND TIED AT MY HAIR
Lifted from my friendster blog dated June 5, 2009
What the hell do I really mean about it by the way? Has it something to do about why the f*ck am i writing here again? Hahahaha! don’t get me f*cking wrong.. I am just literally mad about something. and sure i am not happy about it.
Thanks to my best friend who lifts me up and ate chicken with me earlier. Boy, im so f*cking frustrated. My life is actually like an all purpose rubber band. So strong on the outside and trying to be strong on the inside. (I dont know if i am making a sense here but what the hell?!) I actually experienced being hit by a rubber band when i am trying to squeeze all those goddamn papers at the office. I thought it’s all freakin’ strong. (Cuz it says on the label: ALL PURPOSE) am not dropping any product name, i don’t want to be sued by telling the whole world about it.
THE BAND
getting back, it was so f*cking swollen cuz it really f*cking hurts! hahahaha! my life’s just like that.. my life is the rubber band, unconsciously hurting people and trying to be whole again by depending on the person who will still make a good use out of my broken band. a twist, a tie, a pull and VOILA! i am still of good use. People will keep using me for they know that i am still elastic, will never complain cuz that’s what i want by the way.. be used and feel happy about it. it’s not negative.. but i believe i am letting other people use me cuz i want to be inside their circle. a circle i thought will never break. boy i am wrong again.
THE HAIR
the hair is my feelings.. i don’t feel pain when i am wrapping up my life (RUBBER BAND) to my human emotions. (HAIR) (What the hell?! HUMAN?!) all i want, is to pull my hair out of my face and don’t give a damn if my hair’s all messed up. but when i remove the rubber band, no wonder, i’ll feel like a crap and curse the whole world about the itching and the painful feeling. and will leave my hair all wavy. am i making a sense? now, i am actually on the verge of really breaking down cuz of something that i am not expecting. i am not really sure if i am hurt, but what i am aware is that this is not a good feeling. i want to scream, i want to point a gun at that person’s face and let that person smell my anger!
AM I REALLY ANGRY?
i guess i am.. because if not, i will not spend a single centavo in this cafe shop somewhere near Forbes. we have an internet at home. But i’d rather release all these anger here than go home and feel so f*cking bad about myself.
Makati will always be the city of lights for me.. it will never go dark, (as dark doesn’t really exist) it’s just what we call in the absence of light, right? i hope it will stay that way forever. i know it will..
Or will it?
What the hell do I really mean about it by the way? Has it something to do about why the f*ck am i writing here again? Hahahaha! don’t get me f*cking wrong.. I am just literally mad about something. and sure i am not happy about it.
Thanks to my best friend who lifts me up and ate chicken with me earlier. Boy, im so f*cking frustrated. My life is actually like an all purpose rubber band. So strong on the outside and trying to be strong on the inside. (I dont know if i am making a sense here but what the hell?!) I actually experienced being hit by a rubber band when i am trying to squeeze all those goddamn papers at the office. I thought it’s all freakin’ strong. (Cuz it says on the label: ALL PURPOSE) am not dropping any product name, i don’t want to be sued by telling the whole world about it.
THE BAND
getting back, it was so f*cking swollen cuz it really f*cking hurts! hahahaha! my life’s just like that.. my life is the rubber band, unconsciously hurting people and trying to be whole again by depending on the person who will still make a good use out of my broken band. a twist, a tie, a pull and VOILA! i am still of good use. People will keep using me for they know that i am still elastic, will never complain cuz that’s what i want by the way.. be used and feel happy about it. it’s not negative.. but i believe i am letting other people use me cuz i want to be inside their circle. a circle i thought will never break. boy i am wrong again.
THE HAIR
the hair is my feelings.. i don’t feel pain when i am wrapping up my life (RUBBER BAND) to my human emotions. (HAIR) (What the hell?! HUMAN?!) all i want, is to pull my hair out of my face and don’t give a damn if my hair’s all messed up. but when i remove the rubber band, no wonder, i’ll feel like a crap and curse the whole world about the itching and the painful feeling. and will leave my hair all wavy. am i making a sense? now, i am actually on the verge of really breaking down cuz of something that i am not expecting. i am not really sure if i am hurt, but what i am aware is that this is not a good feeling. i want to scream, i want to point a gun at that person’s face and let that person smell my anger!
AM I REALLY ANGRY?
i guess i am.. because if not, i will not spend a single centavo in this cafe shop somewhere near Forbes. we have an internet at home. But i’d rather release all these anger here than go home and feel so f*cking bad about myself.
Makati will always be the city of lights for me.. it will never go dark, (as dark doesn’t really exist) it’s just what we call in the absence of light, right? i hope it will stay that way forever. i know it will..
Or will it?
AN INTRODUCTION TO CLASSICAL PIANO AND ROCK MUSIC
(Lifted from my Friendster blog)
March 26, 2009
I am listening to Chris Daughtry's Home in the background. Earlier, it was some kind of a classical piano of some freak cuz that's the BGM of our powerpoint presentation for ERDA Foundation Fun Run on Saturday. WTF! I need to wake up three in the morning cuz our service vehicle will depart at four. I guess I'm not really into that.
I am thinking of installing a bookr application in my PSP tonight. I'll skip out here around seven siguro. I don't want traffic. And besides, there's no classes tomorrow. Hehehe feeling! My f*cking PC is too slow!
March 26, 2009
I am listening to Chris Daughtry's Home in the background. Earlier, it was some kind of a classical piano of some freak cuz that's the BGM of our powerpoint presentation for ERDA Foundation Fun Run on Saturday. WTF! I need to wake up three in the morning cuz our service vehicle will depart at four. I guess I'm not really into that.
I am thinking of installing a bookr application in my PSP tonight. I'll skip out here around seven siguro. I don't want traffic. And besides, there's no classes tomorrow. Hehehe feeling! My f*cking PC is too slow!
HOW TO DESCRIBE YOUR CURRENT DILEMMA AND HAPPINESS
(Lifted from my Friendster blog)
March 17, 2009
How nga ba? Hmmm, let me start. My boss is not around, and I am super happy like a jackass! Hahahaha! I can use the internet 24/7 cuz I am a password hacker. I guess I'll answer some of the questions on the bulletin board saying I am super excited cuz I get to play around here ALL day!
Second, I dunno something's bothering me again. It's the booger! Hahaha! No, seriously...
I am currently having problems coming up with another design. Namental block ata ako. When you are serious with something, you tend to think a lot without proper execution. Cuz you want everything to be perfect. You think what they'll say, you think about the risks involved, you think just about anything! That's tiring. But you know what makes me excited about this? This is what I want. This is what I love doing. And I have two good friends supporting me cuz we share the same ideas. I came up with the design for FEU Booster Shirt.
So far, yan pa lang ang meron ako. plus the mock up design of the shirt. We're thinking not to include the copy from the front shirt cuz it will cost us a lot. We're thinking of replacing the front design with the back design.
March 17, 2009
How nga ba? Hmmm, let me start. My boss is not around, and I am super happy like a jackass! Hahahaha! I can use the internet 24/7 cuz I am a password hacker. I guess I'll answer some of the questions on the bulletin board saying I am super excited cuz I get to play around here ALL day!
Second, I dunno something's bothering me again. It's the booger! Hahaha! No, seriously...
I am currently having problems coming up with another design. Namental block ata ako. When you are serious with something, you tend to think a lot without proper execution. Cuz you want everything to be perfect. You think what they'll say, you think about the risks involved, you think just about anything! That's tiring. But you know what makes me excited about this? This is what I want. This is what I love doing. And I have two good friends supporting me cuz we share the same ideas. I came up with the design for FEU Booster Shirt.
So far, yan pa lang ang meron ako. plus the mock up design of the shirt. We're thinking not to include the copy from the front shirt cuz it will cost us a lot. We're thinking of replacing the front design with the back design.
HERE WE GO AGAIN :(
(Lifted from my Friendster blog)
March 3, 2009
Here I am again, thinking and trying to find out what went wrong. Is it me? Am I being selfish again? But as far as I know, I am not. I've changed for a fast one year. Super fast. And I've come to a realization that I can no longer be what I am for the past years. I thank the people responsible for these changes and the people who came in months after that agonizing moment.
Exactly after 11 months of figuring out and at the same time implementing those changes, I am here again, sitting at the same swivel chair and dumping all the ideas that came in negatively. I don't want to do those things anymore cuz I believe that I am no longer that selfish person.
I don't know how and where to start again. I've crossed a lot of problems. [ as if I haven't been into that. ] I don't want to get hurt again. But I know, part of loving and giving all what you've got means you also have to feel the pain. Cuz if not, hindi ka talaga nagmamahal. You have to generously give everything, you have to unselfishly love him even if it cause you a lot. Literally losing everything,
I can only give much.
March 3, 2009
Here I am again, thinking and trying to find out what went wrong. Is it me? Am I being selfish again? But as far as I know, I am not. I've changed for a fast one year. Super fast. And I've come to a realization that I can no longer be what I am for the past years. I thank the people responsible for these changes and the people who came in months after that agonizing moment.
Exactly after 11 months of figuring out and at the same time implementing those changes, I am here again, sitting at the same swivel chair and dumping all the ideas that came in negatively. I don't want to do those things anymore cuz I believe that I am no longer that selfish person.
I don't know how and where to start again. I've crossed a lot of problems. [ as if I haven't been into that. ] I don't want to get hurt again. But I know, part of loving and giving all what you've got means you also have to feel the pain. Cuz if not, hindi ka talaga nagmamahal. You have to generously give everything, you have to unselfishly love him even if it cause you a lot. Literally losing everything,
I can only give much.
Tuesday, December 8, 2009
FRESH MILK EVERYONE? :)
(Lifted from my Friendster blog)
November 29, 2008
I've been dying to post here for the past few months. But then, inaatake ng katamaran.. :) I am actually downloading photography PDF files I got from the internet. Of course, with super fast access from RS. [ Thanks to Astro Knee from his RS premium account. ]
So many things happened from the past few months. I never had a chance to "expose" it all here since most of them are all classified information. Now I am starting to love browsing PU and search for interesting photography files. And these are not just how to's and tips and techniques. PDF file of the original book! Hahaha! I am just so excited, don't get me wrong.. Thanks to Soul Collector for these! Hahaha! I already have that Canon 350D I bought from S' Yahoo last July and my next destination is Vigan! I am a little excited about that, and I am planning to buy a 4GB CF card. I bet, I cannot just consume 1GB of memory for the whole trip. Cuz the last time I went out of Manila, I have to delete atleast a hundred files from my memory card. And I don't know how to use the TV mode yet. That's why a lot of shots are all blurry and I cannot stand seeing them at all. What's more? I can shoot from inside a moving car na. The last time, I missed and messed a lot of opportunities to shoot from a greater angle and subject. Trial and error. Thanks to our in-house photographer! Thanks to Lady Soul Collector for introducing me to her Soul Collector.
November 29, 2008
I've been dying to post here for the past few months. But then, inaatake ng katamaran.. :) I am actually downloading photography PDF files I got from the internet. Of course, with super fast access from RS. [ Thanks to Astro Knee from his RS premium account. ]
So many things happened from the past few months. I never had a chance to "expose" it all here since most of them are all classified information. Now I am starting to love browsing PU and search for interesting photography files. And these are not just how to's and tips and techniques. PDF file of the original book! Hahaha! I am just so excited, don't get me wrong.. Thanks to Soul Collector for these! Hahaha! I already have that Canon 350D I bought from S' Yahoo last July and my next destination is Vigan! I am a little excited about that, and I am planning to buy a 4GB CF card. I bet, I cannot just consume 1GB of memory for the whole trip. Cuz the last time I went out of Manila, I have to delete atleast a hundred files from my memory card. And I don't know how to use the TV mode yet. That's why a lot of shots are all blurry and I cannot stand seeing them at all. What's more? I can shoot from inside a moving car na. The last time, I missed and messed a lot of opportunities to shoot from a greater angle and subject. Trial and error. Thanks to our in-house photographer! Thanks to Lady Soul Collector for introducing me to her Soul Collector.
FEU vs. UST 70-65 Game
(Lifted from my Friendster blog)
July 20, 2008
I met with some college good friends earlier this day. We all went to Ultra and cheer with rest of the Far Eastern University Community. I felt like I am a student spending countless time with my colleagues. No wonder I also felt like I am just starting to enter a new phase of my life. - College and UAAP.
I am way too damn happy being a part of the FEU Cheering Squad. I spent almost my three years there as a Pep Squad / Green Bisons Drummer. As far as my personal life is concerned, I am a mere 75% lover and 25% student. So more or less, you really cannot count on me in terms of academic issues and to other social stuffs relating to attending regular classes.
Having said that, I also spent my college years struggling during every finals of our two semestral years. Luckily, I only get to take Algebra three times, two for Logic and two for Statistics. That would mean, I didn't dare pulling my nerves down to its lowest, bumping all my major subjects off. I am still above average. Hehehe. [ a genius ]
Getting back, FEU during the first quarter of the game, at least to it's seven-minute struggle to make points for the team, was painful. We're like sitting and cursing all those damned day-dreaming players of FEU. Cuz it seems like they are not into the game! What the?! [ Should I say thanks to the guys of the flipside for giving fouls and FEU taking advantage of those free throws? ] Well then, thanks UST! I was like screaming "basura" for that whole quarter. Not really into the mood getting up and do that arm-moving-activity of the Boosters. So I was like, "yea right, I should go home and eat kalabasa." [ not to mention the 1st quarter score: 12 UST - 2 FEU / time left: 3:00 ]
We all thought we are all basura for the whole game [ let's jump now to the main event shall we? ] Fernandez and Barroca came to the rescue. Sobrang galing! I dunno about the other players, but all I saw there was them lang e. Anyway, standing and that arm-activity with yelling automatically came into our system. We can't help but do those cool things and wave our hearts to its full content. Guess what? After that heart-breaking loss against De La Salle, we won.. 5 points against the UST Crying Tigers. Hehehe. 70-65
After the game, bumalik kami ng FEU gym with my guys from GB. We reminisced our old stupid [ but funny ] times as a "second pioneer." I've learned that I missed so much time with them because I was too busy being a full time lover. Nakakapanghinayang. I should have listened to my friends on not to go on a relationship. Hahahaha! Then we ate dinner together somewhere in P. Campa. That, I think is my first time joining the group while eating dinner.
I met with some college good friends earlier this day. We all went to Ultra and cheer with rest of the Far Eastern University Community. I felt like I am a student spending countless time with my colleagues. No wonder I also felt like I am just starting to enter a new phase of my life. - College and UAAP.
I am way too damn happy being a part of the FEU Cheering Squad. I spent almost my three years there as a Pep Squad / Green Bisons Drummer. As far as my personal life is concerned, I am a mere 75% lover and 25% student. So more or less, you really cannot count on me in terms of academic issues and to other social stuffs relating to attending regular classes.
Having said that, I also spent my college years struggling during every finals of our two semestral years. Luckily, I only get to take Algebra three times, two for Logic and two for Statistics. That would mean, I didn't dare pulling my nerves down to its lowest, bumping all my major subjects off. I am still above average. Hehehe. [ a genius ]
Getting back, FEU during the first quarter of the game, at least to it's seven-minute struggle to make points for the team, was painful. We're like sitting and cursing all those damned day-dreaming players of FEU. Cuz it seems like they are not into the game! What the?! [ Should I say thanks to the guys of the flipside for giving fouls and FEU taking advantage of those free throws? ] Well then, thanks UST! I was like screaming "basura" for that whole quarter. Not really into the mood getting up and do that arm-moving-activity of the Boosters. So I was like, "yea right, I should go home and eat kalabasa." [ not to mention the 1st quarter score: 12 UST - 2 FEU / time left: 3:00 ]
We all thought we are all basura for the whole game [ let's jump now to the main event shall we? ] Fernandez and Barroca came to the rescue. Sobrang galing! I dunno about the other players, but all I saw there was them lang e. Anyway, standing and that arm-activity with yelling automatically came into our system. We can't help but do those cool things and wave our hearts to its full content. Guess what? After that heart-breaking loss against De La Salle, we won.. 5 points against the UST Crying Tigers. Hehehe. 70-65
After the game, bumalik kami ng FEU gym with my guys from GB. We reminisced our old stupid [ but funny ] times as a "second pioneer." I've learned that I missed so much time with them because I was too busy being a full time lover. Nakakapanghinayang. I should have listened to my friends on not to go on a relationship. Hahahaha! Then we ate dinner together somewhere in P. Campa. That, I think is my first time joining the group while eating dinner.
GUYS, MEET THE LOVE OF MY LIFE
Lifted from my friendster blog dated June 29, 2008
i’v been into a lot recently.. so far, so happy! didn’t think it would turn out like this. haaaayyy.. someone came along and made my life soooooo complete now. hahaha! at masaya naman akong ganon din pala sya sa akin.
i can die anytime.. anywhere..
hmmm, what else? i can smell the sweet aroma of the upcoming game at UAAP. not because of the basketball itself but the thought of being with my old friends at green bisons and the boosters. haha! sobrang nakakamiss and at the same time, nakakamiss magpakapagod. i am not really familiar with the new beats right now, but i know manageable naman pagdating doon.
and!!! syempre kasama ko sya.. nyahaha! mapapakilala ko na sya finally.. i’ll see the guys at UAAP..
i’v been into a lot recently.. so far, so happy! didn’t think it would turn out like this. haaaayyy.. someone came along and made my life soooooo complete now. hahaha! at masaya naman akong ganon din pala sya sa akin.
i can die anytime.. anywhere..
hmmm, what else? i can smell the sweet aroma of the upcoming game at UAAP. not because of the basketball itself but the thought of being with my old friends at green bisons and the boosters. haha! sobrang nakakamiss and at the same time, nakakamiss magpakapagod. i am not really familiar with the new beats right now, but i know manageable naman pagdating doon.
and!!! syempre kasama ko sya.. nyahaha! mapapakilala ko na sya finally.. i’ll see the guys at UAAP..
WIDE AWAKE
Lifted from my friendster blog dated June 22, 2008
i am still awake, chilling and exhausted. it is already 4:16 in the morning, and i am wondering how on earth will i ever make it to dreamland? browsing other people’s site, checkin out their new photos, creating comments / messages for some. and that’s that.
5 minutes earlier, call of the nature comes. i had to turn the lights on and make my way downstairs. i was surprised that the lights are still on. i checked on my dad to see if he’s sleeping but i didn’t saw him lying there. i was in a little shock. i saw him standing. i asked him why.
someone bumped his bed off. "someone." we are only seven here and the rest are sleeping, how come someone bumped his bed? there might be someone unseen lurking around or just his plain imagination. i can’t define. i believe him though.
i stared at him, looking puzzled. he’s awake, but never had a chance to see who’s right beside him. [ or who's walking past this hour ] creepy. anyway, there is something that i saw that really bothers me: he’s not getting any younger.
i do not want to see him suffer like those of the old folks. and the thought really bothers me.
i am still awake, chilling and exhausted. it is already 4:16 in the morning, and i am wondering how on earth will i ever make it to dreamland? browsing other people’s site, checkin out their new photos, creating comments / messages for some. and that’s that.
5 minutes earlier, call of the nature comes. i had to turn the lights on and make my way downstairs. i was surprised that the lights are still on. i checked on my dad to see if he’s sleeping but i didn’t saw him lying there. i was in a little shock. i saw him standing. i asked him why.
someone bumped his bed off. "someone." we are only seven here and the rest are sleeping, how come someone bumped his bed? there might be someone unseen lurking around or just his plain imagination. i can’t define. i believe him though.
i stared at him, looking puzzled. he’s awake, but never had a chance to see who’s right beside him. [ or who's walking past this hour ] creepy. anyway, there is something that i saw that really bothers me: he’s not getting any younger.
i do not want to see him suffer like those of the old folks. and the thought really bothers me.
DISTURBANCE, PARANOIA
Lifted from my friendster blog dated June 13, 2008
I’ll be having my own dSLR in a few weeks time. yipeeeee! but then, i can’t sleep thinking of that canon350d. now i’m thinking: where in the world will i go to prove my worth as an aspiring photographer? hahaha! sayang! i’ve been in Baguio and saw a lot of subjects. [ sadly, i don't have an SLR camera yet at that point of time ] i have a good picture in my memory during my three-day stay at The City of Pines though. first ever subject: UAAP!!! next destination: VIGAN!
hmmm, what else? [ point of realization ] a friend cannot just tell you things what you should be doing when in fact, she can’t do it herself in the first place. hmmmm.. a great thinking. i didn’t realize that. i expect a lot more of her as a friend who’s there for me / to say anything that would allow my anger to flow right out of my system. i expect a stronger friend. a better person instead. but then again, she’s only human. victim of a strong hope, false happiness and wrong direction.
i won’t mention her name here.
i am just a little affected and a bit shaken because that’s way toooooo long to STILL, carry the pain and all.. i don’t even know what to say cuz i’m just following what she first told me [ based on how she fought for the right and accept what's happening in the present ] parang i want to get out of the office and save the day but i know i just can’t. pero alam naman nyang nandito lang ako para sa kanya.
there will come a point in your life that you will eventually get tired of chasing. you lose & gain hope. katulad ng sinabi mo sa akin, allow your self to grieve. i might be toooooo over-reacting right now dude.. [ what?! ] mejo affected lang ako.
Paranoid.
I’ll be having my own dSLR in a few weeks time. yipeeeee! but then, i can’t sleep thinking of that canon350d. now i’m thinking: where in the world will i go to prove my worth as an aspiring photographer? hahaha! sayang! i’ve been in Baguio and saw a lot of subjects. [ sadly, i don't have an SLR camera yet at that point of time ] i have a good picture in my memory during my three-day stay at The City of Pines though. first ever subject: UAAP!!! next destination: VIGAN!
hmmm, what else? [ point of realization ] a friend cannot just tell you things what you should be doing when in fact, she can’t do it herself in the first place. hmmmm.. a great thinking. i didn’t realize that. i expect a lot more of her as a friend who’s there for me / to say anything that would allow my anger to flow right out of my system. i expect a stronger friend. a better person instead. but then again, she’s only human. victim of a strong hope, false happiness and wrong direction.
i won’t mention her name here.
i am just a little affected and a bit shaken because that’s way toooooo long to STILL, carry the pain and all.. i don’t even know what to say cuz i’m just following what she first told me [ based on how she fought for the right and accept what's happening in the present ] parang i want to get out of the office and save the day but i know i just can’t. pero alam naman nyang nandito lang ako para sa kanya.
there will come a point in your life that you will eventually get tired of chasing. you lose & gain hope. katulad ng sinabi mo sa akin, allow your self to grieve. i might be toooooo over-reacting right now dude.. [ what?! ] mejo affected lang ako.
Paranoid.
A PACK OF STRONG PUNCH
Lifted from my friendster blog dated May 10, 2008
Now I have an idea why people make such a big deal about exes. Y’know… stuff like, getting over the ex. Dealing with the ex. Being friends with the ex. Being the ex.
I know that it’s stupid – and silly — to sound as if my whole life revolved around being somebody’s ex. But I can’t help it… that title packs a pretty strong punch. I am now an official member of the "loved-and-lost" club. And while it’s a title I don’t exactly want, I have to admit that it does say some things about me.
I once loved someone who loved me back. But she didn’t want to stay… So I had to let her go.
I cried. A lot. I spent countless nights wondering what went wrong, muffling my sobs with my pillows so my parent wouldn’t suspect that something was amiss. I’d reminisce about our happy times, then
break down when I’d realize that she was no longer mine. I analyzed every single detail of our breakup. I wrote long e-mails to my closest friends. I talked endlessly about my situation. I spent my nights in tearful telephone conversations and my days in daydreams where we’d end up in each other’s arms again.
Sometimes she was still my angel, still my knight in shining armor who I’d do anything for just to have back. But sometimes, I saw her as the devil incarnate who broke my heart in the worst possible way, and who deserved to be horsewhipped at the very least.
I told myself that it was all for the better. That this was what was best for the both of us. That this was God’s plan. My friends offered similar advice, none of which I hadn’t heard before: "It’s a sign that you’re not meant for each other," "When God closes a door, He opens a window," "Someone better is coming for you," "There are so many other fish in the sea," etc.
But it didn’t work. Because deep down, I still believed that she was the one, the only one. And I couldn’t understand how this was all for the better… when every day seemed more torturous than the last… not being able to be with her the way I wanted to be, seeing her so unaffected, and dealing with my broken-and-smashed heart and my bruised ego.
I tried to immerse myself in other activities to forget about her. I went out a lot. I filled my schedule with movie marathons, computer games among others. It worked for a while… but then there were
times — times when my mind was cleared of the busy thoughts I tried to occupy it with –that I would think of her. Her memory would sneak up to me on tiptoes, catching me in my most vulnerable moments.
I tried to show the world that I was OK. That I was over her. That it was fine just being friends. I didn’t go around with a big "X" on my forehead, nor did I go around with puffy eyes and a tissue box. I tried to live my life as I knew it before I met her. People thought that I was doing great. They heard me laugh and they saw me smile; I seemed happy, they said; and I told myself that I was. But in the solace of my room, where I tried to organize my thoughts and sort out my feelings, I had to admit to myself that I wasn’t truly happy. Because I was still yearning for someone, and my heart still ached for something that could not be.
It’s been 2 months since we broke up, surprisingly, things have gotten better. I’ve changed. Somewhere along the way, I realized that she wasn’t the only one out there for me. I also realized that there were valid, powerful reasons why we split up. And I’ve become stronger, older, wiser.
She’s changed as well — when I look at her, sometimes I still see the girl I fell in love with. Sometimes I think that she’s the same person… she still has the same goofy smile and mischievous charm that I fell for, and I like to believe that the rest of her is unchanged as well. But then I take a
closer look and I realize that she HAS changed… that I don’t know her anymore, not really… not enough to love and care for her as I once did. — my favorite part.. boohoooo!
I’ve loved and lost. I’ve cried tears for the things that were and that could have been. I’ve wrestled with intense feelings of love and hate, of jealousy, of frustration. I’ve simultaneously taken down and
brought up my pride. I’ve tried to rebuild my world without the person whom it used to revolve around. I’ve tried to save myself from the depths of depression and self-pity, and when I couldn’t do that, I turned to God for help.
I don’t know exactly what I gained, or how much I lost. Maybe someday it will be all clear to me… then again, maybe not. lol!
JUMPING STRAW
(Lifted article from my Friendster blog)
May 2, 2008
I had a great day tonight! I can't believe na ang haba na naman ng nilakad namin. Hahahaha! Starts from UST to Espana then sa Blumentritt hanggang sa Quezon Ave. Grabe, I'll post more when I come back. Gtg, gtg. Hahahaha!
I had a great day tonight! I can't believe na ang haba na naman ng nilakad namin. Hahahaha! Starts from UST to Espana then sa Blumentritt hanggang sa Quezon Ave. Grabe, I'll post more when I come back. Gtg, gtg. Hahahaha!
NEVER ENDING PROCESS
Lifted from my friendster blog dated April 13, 2008
I spent time with my friends for the past few weeks without realizing how much time it cost me. It’s been three weeks…
Three weeks of pain and disgust.
My father got hospitalized last April 9. Reason: Prostate Level II. I spent my whole three days there. The last time I remember being a prisoner at the hospital was December, 2003. I remembered how I painfully scribbled my experience on a piece of scratch paper for our Journalism requirement.
“My Christmas Vacation”
Even if I do not want to describe how I spent my Christmas vacation, I don’t have a choice but to tell the truth. I just can’t create things based on my imagination. I can’t even imagine great things at that moment. I remembered how I wrote the line “I do not deserve what is happening to me right now. I should be at home and enjoying.” I was counting the corners of that cold and empty room. Looking at my phone and wishing someone would text and grieve with me. I just can’t hold my tears. I went to the chapel and prayed like I never prayed before. I bought a pay phone card and found myself dialing the number 900-0877.
This time, I do not need to call anyone. They just keep on coming. A friend offered to take a walk at the hospital kahit gabing gabi na. Naglalakad kami sa gitna ng UST, grabe sobrang dami kong nailabas na sama ng loob. There, at that spot, tears ran down again. Mukha kaming tanga! But hey! At least it made me feel better. The next morning, another friend offered help at naghintay sa Jollibee Dapitan gamit ang kanyang mahiwagang mapa. That night, my officemates from Project Finance came. Ang tatlong Marias na kinukuhaan ko ng pagkain everytime na dumadalaw ako sa kabilang building. My phones kept on alerting me for new messages. Sobra! I am using three different phones with three different networks. Been receiving messages from people I least expect to remember me.
But then, I knew something was missing. I would like to find that out soon. I am really not sure of everything right now. But there is an exemption though. This coming week, my father will undergo another operation. I wouldn’t want to visit him at the hospital because I prefer not to see any signs of weakness.
How should I accept everything? I can’t find myself right now… I can’t seem to find things that are supposed to be within my reach. I just can’t reach them anymore. Life is not just about life. Life is not just about moving on and accepting everything. I know there is something I should learn from this. Whatever it is, I don’t wanna know. So many times passed…
I spent time with my friends for the past few weeks without realizing how much time it cost me. It’s been three weeks…
Three weeks of pain and disgust.
My father got hospitalized last April 9. Reason: Prostate Level II. I spent my whole three days there. The last time I remember being a prisoner at the hospital was December, 2003. I remembered how I painfully scribbled my experience on a piece of scratch paper for our Journalism requirement.
“My Christmas Vacation”
Even if I do not want to describe how I spent my Christmas vacation, I don’t have a choice but to tell the truth. I just can’t create things based on my imagination. I can’t even imagine great things at that moment. I remembered how I wrote the line “I do not deserve what is happening to me right now. I should be at home and enjoying.” I was counting the corners of that cold and empty room. Looking at my phone and wishing someone would text and grieve with me. I just can’t hold my tears. I went to the chapel and prayed like I never prayed before. I bought a pay phone card and found myself dialing the number 900-0877.
This time, I do not need to call anyone. They just keep on coming. A friend offered to take a walk at the hospital kahit gabing gabi na. Naglalakad kami sa gitna ng UST, grabe sobrang dami kong nailabas na sama ng loob. There, at that spot, tears ran down again. Mukha kaming tanga! But hey! At least it made me feel better. The next morning, another friend offered help at naghintay sa Jollibee Dapitan gamit ang kanyang mahiwagang mapa. That night, my officemates from Project Finance came. Ang tatlong Marias na kinukuhaan ko ng pagkain everytime na dumadalaw ako sa kabilang building. My phones kept on alerting me for new messages. Sobra! I am using three different phones with three different networks. Been receiving messages from people I least expect to remember me.
But then, I knew something was missing. I would like to find that out soon. I am really not sure of everything right now. But there is an exemption though. This coming week, my father will undergo another operation. I wouldn’t want to visit him at the hospital because I prefer not to see any signs of weakness.
How should I accept everything? I can’t find myself right now… I can’t seem to find things that are supposed to be within my reach. I just can’t reach them anymore. Life is not just about life. Life is not just about moving on and accepting everything. I know there is something I should learn from this. Whatever it is, I don’t wanna know. So many times passed…
A GUY WHO SAVED HER LIFE?!
Lifted from my friendster blog dated April 3, 2008
Ever wondered why life is sometimes a pain in the ass? I am thinking about that too. That we wish every second of our lives will not be one of the daily routine but more of an everyday adventure.
I may be talking non-sense here, but hell yeah, this is what I would like to do with my own damn routine. Wishing something better will knock at my front door and fetch me up with arms wide open. I’ve always wanted to do something not me. More not like me. Like someone who can bungee jump without safety harness. And more like someone who can do things not suitable for a normal person. I don’t know what those things are yet, but one thing I am certain…
I’d like to jump a thousand feet high up in the air without parachutes. And land safely on a rubberized-bulls eye. Can you picture that? You do? Or do you not? I don’t care. I see myself that way. It is not like attempting suicide. But if you are the person whom I would like to be, you will understand how I would like things to be done. (Or not done)
Life is just as simple as “life must go on” and “things aren’t suppose to be there exactly as you want it to be.” How is that so simple? I can’t understand. Life is not just about life. There is something more than that. Much deeper, much painful realization that life is not just about living, breathing and being happy. (Am still going to find that out)
I’ll just have to resent people who seem so unaffected and inconsiderate. Thinking just about what they wanted to do and not think about the feelings of the person they are hurting. You see, life is not just about life. It has deeper meaning. And no matter how much we read inspirational books or hear people tell stories about how they fought for their rights, I think it is not just about that.
Living in regrets, living in hatred… I cannot blame people who tried to take their own lives by their own hands. It must be really too much to bear.
Ever wondered why life is sometimes a pain in the ass? I am thinking about that too. That we wish every second of our lives will not be one of the daily routine but more of an everyday adventure.
I may be talking non-sense here, but hell yeah, this is what I would like to do with my own damn routine. Wishing something better will knock at my front door and fetch me up with arms wide open. I’ve always wanted to do something not me. More not like me. Like someone who can bungee jump without safety harness. And more like someone who can do things not suitable for a normal person. I don’t know what those things are yet, but one thing I am certain…
I’d like to jump a thousand feet high up in the air without parachutes. And land safely on a rubberized-bulls eye. Can you picture that? You do? Or do you not? I don’t care. I see myself that way. It is not like attempting suicide. But if you are the person whom I would like to be, you will understand how I would like things to be done. (Or not done)
Life is just as simple as “life must go on” and “things aren’t suppose to be there exactly as you want it to be.” How is that so simple? I can’t understand. Life is not just about life. There is something more than that. Much deeper, much painful realization that life is not just about living, breathing and being happy. (Am still going to find that out)
I’ll just have to resent people who seem so unaffected and inconsiderate. Thinking just about what they wanted to do and not think about the feelings of the person they are hurting. You see, life is not just about life. It has deeper meaning. And no matter how much we read inspirational books or hear people tell stories about how they fought for their rights, I think it is not just about that.
Living in regrets, living in hatred… I cannot blame people who tried to take their own lives by their own hands. It must be really too much to bear.
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